What To Expect When You Are Expecting Another Family’s Baby
Having a previous healthy pregnancy is a requirement for becoming a surrogate. Women who have been pregnant more than one time know that each pregnancy is different. That is what makes them so special! But what differences should you expect with a surrogacy? While no one can predict what your physical experience of pregnancy as a surrogate will be like, there are key differences and benefits you should be aware of.
Surrogacy Support System
One of the best things about a surrogate pregnancy is you get more than double the support system! In addition to your own family and friends, with the intended parents and ISC helping you along every step of the way, you will have so much extra support. Our staff is 100% dedicated to making your surrogacy be as positive an experience as possible. From day one we provide you with a caring place for questions and help you throughout your surrogacy journey.
At ISC we offer a monthly support group for surrogates. Our past surrogates have said this has made a huge impact for them. A surrogacy is such a special time; some experiences will be ones only other surrogates can understand. Being able to provide you with that support is very important to us. We also offer spa weekends and other events for our surrogates to help them relax and have fun!
The Intended Parents
Hands down the biggest difference with your surrogate pregnancy will be the intended parents! Many surrogates form a deep bond with their intended parents, developing a relationship that’s almost like a second family. They will be with you providing support throughout your journey, being a part of the process as you help them celebrate the milestones and count down the days until they hold their precious baby in their arms (thanks to you!).
The bond between a surrogate and intended parents can vary a lot depending on the people involved. For some it lasts only during the pregnancy. Other families form a bond that lasts for years. At ISC we ask a lot of questions and make sure to match intended parents with a surrogate who has similar expectations and desires from this relationship, so that everyone is comfortable and there’s no misunderstanding. But no matter the length of your relationship with your intended parents, the bond you form with them is a special experience.
Hormones & IVF Treatments
Some surrogates report the biggest difference in a surrogacy is the hormones. Because you will go through IVF to become pregnant, you will be on hormones before your surrogate pregnancy and during the first trimester to ensure the pregnancy has the best chance possible to be healthy. These hormones can sometimes amplify the early pregnancy symptoms for some women while others notice no difference.
Bonding With Baby
Since the surrogate child is not biologically their own, it is very common for surrogates to mention they do not bond with the surrogate baby like they did with their own child. This doesn’t mean you don’t enjoy the pregnancy and relish every kick. Especially when you can take part in the joy and excitement of the intended parents. Being a surrogate is very fulfilling. Not preparing for baby’s arrival is partly attributed to this. With your own pregnancy there isn’t really an ending. You go from pregnancy, to delivery and right into motherhood. It can often feel like a whirlwind and you can barely catch your breath.
With a surrogacy the goal at the end is helping someone else create a family. The sense of satisfaction you feel will differ from with your own. But it has an end in a way that your own pregnancy does not.
A lot of surrogates report they often forget they are pregnant! Preparing for your own baby’s arrival takes a lot of time and planning; from decorating the nursery to finding child care. Just figuring out how your special bundle will fit in your lives can consume a lot of thought. It can be overwhelming, especially the first time! You will have more time to focus on pampering yourself a little during your surrogacy.
It‘s no secret money and finances are a huge stress in life. Because of the planning that goes into a surrogacy, unexpected expenses have already been accounted for and provided by ISC and the intended parents. And it isn’t just the big expenses! Things like maternity clothes, lost wages for medical appointments, even parking are all expenses that are covered. reimbursed. These little things can help alleviate so much stress!
One of the best things about a surrogacy is when you deliver the baby, you will focus on your recovery without the distractions of caring for a newborn. Many surrogates report the recovery from pregnancy and delivery was a lot faster than their own pregnancies. With no newborn at home, it is much easier to get the rest you need. The same goes for the intended parents, who get to start their lives off with baby without having to recover from pregnancy and delivery.
Finally, there is no article on the internet that will put into words that feeling you have after you have just given a family one of the greatest gifts a person can receive. Do you remember the first time you looked at your own baby and realized this precious, beautiful miracle is yours? The love you feel for your child is like no other. You were able to give that experience to someone else. Changing someone’s life is one of the greatest gifts we can give and it’s why we do what we do at ISC.
More questions about what it’s like to be a surrogate? Talk to us!